HUSBAND BEATING HIS WIFE.
Bismillahir Rehmanir Raheem!
Alhamdulillahi was salatu was salam 'ala Rasoolullah!
Asalam-o-alaikum-wa-rehmatullahi-wa-bara
Hope all darlings r well inshaALLAH!:)
Today’s topic is really interesting, as it is which really needs to be cleared as nowadays its thought that in Islam Husband is allowed to beat his wife. Especially by Kafirs and some so called muslims.
Example: If husband gets angry he slaps wife on her face in front of everyone, or if she tells him to stop doing something wrong he takes her into bed room locks the door n takes out his belt n beats her as if she is an animal or worst than that or torturing wife if she has not brought jahez where as jahez at first place is not Islamic.
It is assumed as if around the world what ever husbands are doing with wives is correct especially if a Muslim man does so he says that I m allowed, she is my wife I have right on her, who r u to speak, its our personal matter etc. And they most of the time quote an ayah from QURAN , “…strike them….” Surah An Nisa. By quoting this ayah these men really shut the mouth of a person who does not has sound knowledge of Islam.
So, we have to get proper knowledge of Islam to deal with such people inshaALLAH. So lets have a deep understanding of this matter inshaALLAH, as v know our ALLAH does not do injustice to any soul, whether that b male or female.
We all know that husband is qawam [head] of family {its in QURAN}. So he has duties of Disciplining family this n that {its in QURAN}.
A leader will inevitable have to deal with the “tough” job of discipline. Discipline is an important process that must be properly implemented. It has its rules and regulations. Violation those rules would undermine or invalidate the whole process, and may result in more damage than good.
The man, being the leader of the family, has the obligation of enforcing the “Family law” for the well-being of the family. The rules of discipline between the man and his wife have been set by ALLAH in His Book and in His Messenger [Salla ALLAHU alayhi was sallam]’s Sunnah.
In the following, ALLAH mentions four main steps for dealing with a rebellious wife (who insists on violating ALLAH’s commands):
“But those women from whom you fear defiance (first) admonish them; then (if the persist), forsake them in bed; and (finally,) strike them, If they then obey you, seek no means against them. Indeed, ALLAH is ever Exalted and Great. And if you fear dissension between the two of them, appoint an arbitrator from his people and an arbitrator from hers. If they both desire reconciliation, ALLAH will facilitate it between them, Indeed, ALLAH is Knowing and Acquainted. ”
Surah An-Nisa 4:34-35.
ADMONISMENT:
From the above ayah, we see that the first step in discipline is admonishment. One may not go to the next step before performing this step. And admonishment should be conducted earnestly, in a manner satisfying the proper etiquettes of commanding the good and forbidding the wrong.
ABANDONMENT:
If admonishment fails and the wife persists in her wrong behavior, the husband may go to the next step, which is abandoning her bed. This is a strong disciplinary action that would normally shake the woman’s being and make her realize that her husband is willing to forsake her bed and charms because of her rebellious behavior, which is often sufficient reason for her to take heed and comply.
PERMISSION OF HITTING:
As we have seen in the above ayah of Surah un Nisa (4:34), if the first two steps do not work with the wife and she continues to be disobedient and rebellious, the husband may resort to hitting her.
However, hitting has restrictions: it should not be painful, should not leave marks on the body, and should avoid the face, and abdomen. ‘Arnr Bin al-Ahwas al-Jushami(R.A): reported that ALLAH’s Messenger (salla ALLAHU alayhi was sallam) said:
“Lo! Take good care of women, for they surely are captives under your charge, and you do not possess of them any more than this (subordination) – unless they commit a manifest sin. If they do, abandon them in sleep, and beat them lightly. If they obey you, do not apply any further punishment.” (48)
‘Ata’ (R.A) reported that he asked Ibn ‘Abbas (R.A), “What is ‘light hitting’?” He replied, “It is to hit with siwak (49) stick or something like it.” (50) SubhanALLAH!
One may ask, “What is the benefit of light hitting?” The answer is that a woman normally has a sensitive nature; the slightest show of discourtesy to her would tremendously affect her and cause her to rethink her actions. If, on the other hand, light hitting does not work with her, brutal hitting won’t.
We should keep in mind that the purpose of hitting is to correct and remind, and not to avenge or harm.
DISAPPROVAL OF HITTING:
Even though a man is allowed to his his wife in certain situations, hitting her is disliked in Islam and is considered the resort of the helpless. Iyas Bin ‘Abdillah ad-Dawsi (R.A) reported that ALLAH’s Messenger (salla ALLAHU alayhi was sallam) said:
“Do not hit ALLAH’s female slaves (i.e., the women)”
Our Prophet and example (salla ALLAHU alayhi was sallam), never hit any of his wives.
‘A’ishah (R.A) reported:
“Never did ALLAH’s Messenger (salla ALLAHU alayhi was sallam) hit with his hand a women, a servant, or anyone else- except during fighting for ALLAH’s cause.” (51)
It is inconceivable how a man could harshly hit his wife and then except her to render intimate pleasures to him! ‘Abdullah Bin Zam’ah (R.A) reported that ALLAH’s Messenger said:
“How could one of you turn to his wife and whip her like whipping a camel and then make love to her at the end of the day!?” (52)
Many husbands abuse their wives and justify this by the texts that command the wife to obey the husband or that allow him to discipline her. Those husbands must understand that discipline is a well-regulated matter in Islam, and has no room for abuse. An abusive husband is indeed an oppressor. Furthermore, and abused wife has the full right to turn to justice and seek punishment of her abusive husband.
DIVORCE
We have seen above that the last step in the discipline process is arbitration. If that does not work, nothing would be left but divorce.
Divorce is the right of the husband. But it is his obligation to apply it in the right measure and when the necessity arises.
Hope points are clear inshaALLAH!
So such husbands who do evil to their wives must FEAR ALLAH. AND FOLLOW QURAN AND SUNNAH!
----------------------------------------
48 - Reported by at-Tirmidhi, an-Nasai, and Ibn Majah. Verified to be hasan by al- Albani (Sahih ul- Jami’ no. 7880 and Irwa’ ul- Ghalil no. 2030).
49 – Siwak or miswak A thin and short stick (usually about 6 inches or 20 cm long). Cut from the roots of a desert tree called arak, and used to clean the teeth.
50- Al- Qurtubi’s “Al- Jami’ li- Ahkam il-Quran” 5:172.
51- Recorded by Muslim and others.
52- Recorded by al-Bukhari, Muslim, and others
Bismillahir Rehmanir Raheem!
Alhamdulillahi was salatu was salam 'ala Rasoolullah!
Asalam-o-alaikum-wa-rehmatullahi-wa-bara
Hope all darlings r well inshaALLAH!:)
Today’s topic is really interesting, as it is which really needs to be cleared as nowadays its thought that in Islam Husband is allowed to beat his wife. Especially by Kafirs and some so called muslims.
Example: If husband gets angry he slaps wife on her face in front of everyone, or if she tells him to stop doing something wrong he takes her into bed room locks the door n takes out his belt n beats her as if she is an animal or worst than that or torturing wife if she has not brought jahez where as jahez at first place is not Islamic.
It is assumed as if around the world what ever husbands are doing with wives is correct especially if a Muslim man does so he says that I m allowed, she is my wife I have right on her, who r u to speak, its our personal matter etc. And they most of the time quote an ayah from QURAN , “…strike them….” Surah An Nisa. By quoting this ayah these men really shut the mouth of a person who does not has sound knowledge of Islam.
So, we have to get proper knowledge of Islam to deal with such people inshaALLAH. So lets have a deep understanding of this matter inshaALLAH, as v know our ALLAH does not do injustice to any soul, whether that b male or female.
We all know that husband is qawam [head] of family {its in QURAN}. So he has duties of Disciplining family this n that {its in QURAN}.
A leader will inevitable have to deal with the “tough” job of discipline. Discipline is an important process that must be properly implemented. It has its rules and regulations. Violation those rules would undermine or invalidate the whole process, and may result in more damage than good.
The man, being the leader of the family, has the obligation of enforcing the “Family law” for the well-being of the family. The rules of discipline between the man and his wife have been set by ALLAH in His Book and in His Messenger [Salla ALLAHU alayhi was sallam]’s Sunnah.
In the following, ALLAH mentions four main steps for dealing with a rebellious wife (who insists on violating ALLAH’s commands):
“But those women from whom you fear defiance (first) admonish them; then (if the persist), forsake them in bed; and (finally,) strike them, If they then obey you, seek no means against them. Indeed, ALLAH is ever Exalted and Great. And if you fear dissension between the two of them, appoint an arbitrator from his people and an arbitrator from hers. If they both desire reconciliation, ALLAH will facilitate it between them, Indeed, ALLAH is Knowing and Acquainted. ”
Surah An-Nisa 4:34-35.
ADMONISMENT:
From the above ayah, we see that the first step in discipline is admonishment. One may not go to the next step before performing this step. And admonishment should be conducted earnestly, in a manner satisfying the proper etiquettes of commanding the good and forbidding the wrong.
ABANDONMENT:
If admonishment fails and the wife persists in her wrong behavior, the husband may go to the next step, which is abandoning her bed. This is a strong disciplinary action that would normally shake the woman’s being and make her realize that her husband is willing to forsake her bed and charms because of her rebellious behavior, which is often sufficient reason for her to take heed and comply.
PERMISSION OF HITTING:
As we have seen in the above ayah of Surah un Nisa (4:34), if the first two steps do not work with the wife and she continues to be disobedient and rebellious, the husband may resort to hitting her.
However, hitting has restrictions: it should not be painful, should not leave marks on the body, and should avoid the face, and abdomen. ‘Arnr Bin al-Ahwas al-Jushami(R.A): reported that ALLAH’s Messenger (salla ALLAHU alayhi was sallam) said:
“Lo! Take good care of women, for they surely are captives under your charge, and you do not possess of them any more than this (subordination) – unless they commit a manifest sin. If they do, abandon them in sleep, and beat them lightly. If they obey you, do not apply any further punishment.” (48)
‘Ata’ (R.A) reported that he asked Ibn ‘Abbas (R.A), “What is ‘light hitting’?” He replied, “It is to hit with siwak (49) stick or something like it.” (50) SubhanALLAH!
One may ask, “What is the benefit of light hitting?” The answer is that a woman normally has a sensitive nature; the slightest show of discourtesy to her would tremendously affect her and cause her to rethink her actions. If, on the other hand, light hitting does not work with her, brutal hitting won’t.
We should keep in mind that the purpose of hitting is to correct and remind, and not to avenge or harm.
DISAPPROVAL OF HITTING:
Even though a man is allowed to his his wife in certain situations, hitting her is disliked in Islam and is considered the resort of the helpless. Iyas Bin ‘Abdillah ad-Dawsi (R.A) reported that ALLAH’s Messenger (salla ALLAHU alayhi was sallam) said:
“Do not hit ALLAH’s female slaves (i.e., the women)”
Our Prophet and example (salla ALLAHU alayhi was sallam), never hit any of his wives.
‘A’ishah (R.A) reported:
“Never did ALLAH’s Messenger (salla ALLAHU alayhi was sallam) hit with his hand a women, a servant, or anyone else- except during fighting for ALLAH’s cause.” (51)
It is inconceivable how a man could harshly hit his wife and then except her to render intimate pleasures to him! ‘Abdullah Bin Zam’ah (R.A) reported that ALLAH’s Messenger said:
“How could one of you turn to his wife and whip her like whipping a camel and then make love to her at the end of the day!?” (52)
Many husbands abuse their wives and justify this by the texts that command the wife to obey the husband or that allow him to discipline her. Those husbands must understand that discipline is a well-regulated matter in Islam, and has no room for abuse. An abusive husband is indeed an oppressor. Furthermore, and abused wife has the full right to turn to justice and seek punishment of her abusive husband.
DIVORCE
We have seen above that the last step in the discipline process is arbitration. If that does not work, nothing would be left but divorce.
Divorce is the right of the husband. But it is his obligation to apply it in the right measure and when the necessity arises.
Hope points are clear inshaALLAH!
So such husbands who do evil to their wives must FEAR ALLAH. AND FOLLOW QURAN AND SUNNAH!
----------------------------------------
48 - Reported by at-Tirmidhi, an-Nasai, and Ibn Majah. Verified to be hasan by al- Albani (Sahih ul- Jami’ no. 7880 and Irwa’ ul- Ghalil no. 2030).
49 – Siwak or miswak A thin and short stick (usually about 6 inches or 20 cm long). Cut from the roots of a desert tree called arak, and used to clean the teeth.
50- Al- Qurtubi’s “Al- Jami’ li- Ahkam il-Quran” 5:172.
51- Recorded by Muslim and others.
52- Recorded by al-Bukhari, Muslim, and others
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